At A Loss

A blog is all about writing from the heart, baring your soul, and having a unique voice in the loud cacophony of other unique voices clamoring at micro-seconds for the attention of the 2.4 billion web users world-wide.  It’s a big responsibility when your voice represents an important organization like Shepherds College.

It’s also a little embarrassing when you have to say, like I do today, that I have lost my voice! 

It’s not that I don’t have anything to share with you. Learning and growth and events happen on campus every day! But blogging is so personal, so transparent, and if you look into my heart and into my mind today, you would see only one thing. I can’t think of anything else.

My youth pastor and his wife just had their first baby a few days ago, a beautiful little boy named Ethan.

Ethan was full-term and, upon delivery, looked very healthy. 

It wasn’t long before the doctors noticed that Ethan wasn’t breathing right. The pressure of the first few breaths caused vessels in his lungs to burst, filling his lungs with blood. Other problems soon became evident. He needed transfusions and clotting medicine.  Doctors quickly realized he would have to be transferred to a facility with more appropriate medical equipment and more specialized care and attention. Ethan, with his dad by his side, was rushed to a children’s hospital in Chicago. His mom needed to stay behind for a couple of days to recover for the journey.

So the only thing in my heart and mind today is, “Please God…”

“Please, God, strengthen this little boy’s body… Please, God, bring his mom and dad comfort and grow their faith… Please, God, help this baby’s brain to function properly… Please, God, let Ethan live to experience his mom’s kisses, his dad’s strong hugs, the feel of his first giggle bubbling up his throat, the lick of a puppy, the first taste of ice cream, the wet squish of mud between his chubby toes, the tickle of a ladybug in his hand… Please God, please God, please God…”

Ethan’s dad wrote the following in his CaringBridge blog:

“I am beginning to understand at a different level concerning God's love for me.  My love for Ethan is but a fraction of God's love for him and His love for me.  I would do anything for my son; I would trade places with him if it meant he would be well.  I would take his pain for him if I could.  Unfortunately, I am unable to do that.  The Good News is that we have a Heavenly Father who is able to do it.  He demonstrated it by coming and suffering for us by becoming a man -- Jesus.  

I desire to be a father who will do everything in my power to take care of the precious gift I have been given.”

After I read this – this glimpse into a father’s loving heart – it hit me that many of you, as parents of our Shepherds College students, have gone through experiences similar to that of my youth pastor’s. Maybe you heard the words “poor lung function” or “weak heart beat.” Or maybe it was “abnormal brain activity” or “non-responsive.” Whatever it was, you went through your own version of the litany, “Please God, please God, please God…”

And now, you’ve entrusted Shepherds College with these same children you wept over, prayed over and rejoiced over. 

Together we are watching the results of your early pain and tears and “please God” prayers blossom into faith and strength and confidence and abilities and an unending string of “thank you God, thank you God, thank you God..."

We are humbled that you trust us with your precious children after all the love and prayers you’ve invested into their lives.

That’s all that is in my heart and mind today. 

No great words about the academics or teachers or administration of Shepherds College - although there are plenty of great words to say about all of it. No fun stuff, even though there is plenty of that going around too. Just an overwhelming gratitude for life, for children, and for a God who hears our prayers.

 


Shepherds College - Guiding Your Transition to Appropriate Independence. Please visit us at www.shepherdscollege.edu.